Friday, September 16, 2016

It's National Step Family Day

Did you know that one in three Americans live in a stepfamily and 30% of children are currently growing up in a stepfamily? Today is a day to honor those that have taken the role to care endlessly for children they don’t even share the same DNA as. Certain studies say it can take up to several years for a child to form a bond with a stepfather or mother, but once that bond is formed, it can be unbreakable.  I, for one, can attest to that.

As if raising kids of your own isn't hard enough, that responsibility is doubly hard as a step-parent. Step-parents get a bad rap almost from the get-go. Jason and I have been married for almost fourteen years.  He came in with three (actually two at the time with one on the way) and I came in with three. We've never conceived a child together. Minus the maid, we are the modern day Brady Bunch.  Early on, if Jason and I ever fought about anything, it was almost always about the kids. And if he and I weren't arguing about it, we were going at it with the other parents involved. Ugly, I tell ya! I swore that if he and I ever got divorced, it for sure was going to be because of the blended family breakdown.
me and Jason with our six kids in April

The first day my daughter met Jason she made it perfectly clear she didn't need another father in her life. One day all six kids would like each other and the next day it was a war of mine versus his. In all brutal honesty, it took a few years for us to mend the gap and just learn to all get along. I can't change the past but, knowing what I know now, I would've walked into the relationship a totally different way. It took a few years of complete chaos but we finally got it right. His kids are mine and my kids are his. We all get along and feel as if we are a complete family.

Are you in a blended family relationship? What are your experiences or what is your advice for a blended family?

2 comments:

Darlene said...

My favorite smell is coconut

VickieC said...

yes we are,,our kids were 18,20,22,24,28 when we got married,i had been married before for 30 yr and him 23 yrs,,,its been a rocky road with his kids,,as the older they got the meaner they got,,as of this date they havent spoke to me since Jan.2016,,honestly i think it will be the end of my marriage,,i dont see why adult children have to have a input on your marriage but these three do,,we the two girls and the boy just follows with them,,its sad and my heart is broken,,,,i guess time with tell,,we dated long distance for 2 yrs and been married for 13 so we are talking about adults in their upper 30's too old for this behavior in my opinion,,keep us in your prayers please,,im almost 61 and my health is very bad,,dont need this drama